Given that I don't know many people, and am a total loss for how to grow that small circle, I sometimes read through places like the Reddit R4R
. Most of the time, these posts are either people looking for quick sex or they sound fake. A common pattern I notice there is that most of the accounts in use, are only used _for_ that sub, specifically, or are just throw-away accounts.
In any case, from time to time, something which sounds a bit more broad in appeal (not looking for a person to fill a role but looking for a person who more generally gets along) or believable in presentation appears there. I always wonder if I should contact these people in a desperate attempt to feel more connected to the space. Of course, if I were to do this, I would do it openly and honestly: no hiding behind a fake account, I would use my normal one to provide a basis for my real nature.
Still, for some reason I never do. I am not sure if I feel that it is too much effort to take an interest in talking to someone, only to be ignored (an assumption I learned in the OKCupid days). Maybe it is a fear of a connection to my real identity: "contacting people in personals, how scandalous!" But I am not someone normally vulnerable to those sorts of childish politics, nor would I easily bow to that kind of mob intimidation.
In general, I think that it is probably a combination of "the internet isn't real, so don't expend real time or emotions there" and "I have no intrinsic value and can be trivially replaced by any other human of my loose physical description so I would be ignored".
On the other hand, things aren't going well and I can't see them improving, based on the current trajectory. Something needs to happen, needs to change, and it is starting to not matter what that something is.